Entry tags:
TDM #2
TDM #2
DREAMING (new characters)

You take a step forward for what else is there to do? As you walk you begin to remember what it was you were doing before the nothingness; maybe something as simple as chatting with a loved one or close friend. Maybe you were just beginning a great journey or facing off against an old foe. Whatever it was, you get the distinct feeling that wherever and whenever that was, it is not here. Not now.
The path of light twists off into different directions. When you look up you can see that it is not a sky above you but the sky of everything, a grand cosmic tapestry littered with not mere stars but galaxies and clusters of galaxies that gleam like crystals against the velvety backdrop of space. Admire it for a moment, if you will. You don't know how long you will drift here, but you are not alone. Other wanderers will come and go as you bask together in the vastness of creation.
It seems to you that there are two paths to walk in this place, the light and dark beckoning in turn.
❖ THE LIGHT AT THE CENTER
One leads you to the center, splintered fragments folding together and colliding until only one thing remains: a light that speaks to you with the voice of all there is and has ever been. It greets you simultaneously as an old friend and as a lost child, both rejoicing in and mourning your arrival. You remember it too, somehow, with a feeling of complex nostalgia, as if returning to a place recalled from your distant childhood.
You’ll feel the same of the other wanderers that join you in the light; you know their faces, their voices, and as you reflect upon the world of your birth, you may witness fragments of theirs as well. You feel a comradery, then, a synchronicity of thought and emotion. Are the lives of others truly so different from your own? Or are you simply two hands of the same, greater being? Though some individualistic part of you may resist, the longer you spend in the light, the more you will find yourself becoming one with it.
Despite this welcoming call, no matter how eagerly your pursue its embrace, before you can fully submerge yourself in this oneness you will find yourself being torn away. As if seized by the impossibly long, cold arm of a creature unseen, you are plucked from the edge of fulfillment. The last thing you will remember is the sensation of your world, and all the others your experienced here, collapsing into nothingness.
❖ THE DARK OUTSIDE (CW: deep despair, ego death)
The other leads towards the outside, where the splintering becomes so great that the vestiges of reality can do nothing but collapse back into the abyss at the end of everything. As you wander to these barren outskirts, your thoughts will not be drawn to familiarity and oneness, but instead to memories of discontent and waste. The darker the path becomes, the more you find yourself dwelling on life’s disappointments and injustices, of the things about yourself and your world you find wanting.
If you see others here, at first they will feel frightening or contemptible, as if representing to you the worst experiences in your life. Even if they are someone you’re certain you know, that familiarity and affection will be stripped away in the face of the great emptiness before you. In the end, you were all the same. In the end, none of this was worth it. If you approach the end together, you may even form a kind of kinship around this acknowledgment, as the need for paranoia and hatred fades.
Slowly, the darkness encroaches, and you can see it devouring all the things you once knew. Memories of your home, of those you loved, dissolve into nothing, and you can only reflect on the barren emptiness in your heart as you see it happen. In your final moments, though, you feel peace with it all, knowing that there was no other way. You step from the edge of the last dwindling fragment of being and are greeted by silence.
❖ THE END
No matter which way you go, you are left with a single impression: you feel the world you came from die. It's a realization that transcends logic or sense; it weighs on your heart and leaves the vestiges of dark memories dancing in your thoughts like motes of ash. It's a memory of your home crumbling away into nothing as if consumed from within by rot. Returned to the void, all that's left to you is to be reborn.
REBIRTH (new characters)

The chrysalis surrounding you bends like flesh and cracks like glass. It tears as you force your fingers through, finding liberation one inch at a time, until finally you have emerged. As if having undergone metamorphosis, you feel old and new all at once. You are weak, piteously so, but the markings and scars of your previous life remain. As you slump down upon the smooth cavern stone, you realize that you've just wrenched yourself free of gigantic crystal, though its hollow, shimmering form is now in pieces on account of your passing. Somewhere on your body, a shard of similar material remains embedded.
The cave itself looks almost like the inside of a geode, the walls and ceiling bedazzled with greyish crystal that shines with all the colors of the rainbow. While they vary wildly in size and shape, only a few have grown large enough to hold a form like yours, and you can see the one you just escaped isn't the only one bearing a passenger within. They may have already hatched, or they may still be lingering in stasis. Either way, there's enough time that you may have a chance to speak to yours unexpected peers, or to perhaps to struggle to find something to cover your naked body with. You feel the chill of the open air against your moisture laden skin, a distant light trickling in through the cavern's opening.
Make the most of this time. It won't be long before you're interrupted.
[Mod Note: If you don't want to deal with your character being naked in front of the others at that location, feel free to assume they emerge at a different time than the others of their legacy. Characters will be 'hatching' over a period of several hours.]
DREAMING (OLD CHARACTERS)
For those already in Horos, they will find themselves in the same dreamscape as the new arrivals, only, this time, it's familiar. You'll feel more cognizant of your surroundings as you reawaken in this psychedelic realm, more in control of your emotions. What's more, you recognize that light at the center and the darkness at the edge: it's the Pleroma and Kenoma respectively. The one you are attuned to will call our to your soul, and though you are technically free to wander as you please, the closer you get to the force of your opposite sect, the more it will grate against you spiritually. Pleroma attuned nearing the Kenoma will feel as if its presence is desperately trying to tear them apart, and Kenoma attuned nearing the Pleroma will feel as if its light is burning them from the inside out.
More importantly, you notice that entirely new souls are wandering here with faces you didn't see in the cavern. It gradually becomes clear that they are Aions in the same state you were prior to your rebirth, lost and wandering this stretch of the cosmos with no idea what's to come. Maybe this is your chance to ease the confusion of their arrival, or maybe you'd simply like to scope out what kind of people are on their way. It's also possible for you to run into Aions already in Horos, wandering just like you are. Unfortunately, things are a lot less neutral than they are the last time you shared this realm.
No matter what you do, eventually the cosmos above will begin to burn out, just as it did the first time you were here. As darkness swallows reality itself, you will wake with the visceral memory of your world corrupting and breaking apart.
More importantly, you notice that entirely new souls are wandering here with faces you didn't see in the cavern. It gradually becomes clear that they are Aions in the same state you were prior to your rebirth, lost and wandering this stretch of the cosmos with no idea what's to come. Maybe this is your chance to ease the confusion of their arrival, or maybe you'd simply like to scope out what kind of people are on their way. It's also possible for you to run into Aions already in Horos, wandering just like you are. Unfortunately, things are a lot less neutral than they are the last time you shared this realm.
No matter what you do, eventually the cosmos above will begin to burn out, just as it did the first time you were here. As darkness swallows reality itself, you will wake with the visceral memory of your world corrupting and breaking apart.
SEARCHING (OLD CHARACTERS)

All characters will have the opportunity to acquire a 'returning stone'. In all cases, this will amount to an amulet made of the same shimmering material as the shrine monuments, though the stylization differs between the Pleroma and the Kenoma. While regular Aion teleportation can bring you to any of the shrines you know the sigil and location of, a returning stone is magically programmed to bring its wearer back to a specific destination to which it is attuned. Normally, these stones will only be able to store enough energy for one 'return' a month, but it turns out that the ambient power created by the shrines being active will temporarily super charge them. Though it's not guaranteed, this means they may generate enough energy to perform multiple returns for TDM purposes.
Spare returning stones will be issued to all Aions so that they can be used to bring back anyone they collect, as it's possible to bring someone alongside you if they are also wearing a returning stone. Where your stone leads will depend on your sect.
❖ PLEROMA
Tehri will be the one to supply returning stones, based out of Greentruth. She will not travel to Godsblood to deliver returning stones to those that have not visited Greentruth, but it can be assumed that Greentruth's visitors can pass them along to anyone who has been staying in the city. The returning stones are apparently set to bring them to a secure location beneath the water of Godsblood's coast. From there, new arrivals will have to be allowed to rest and then brought up into the city when they're ready.
Greentruth is limited in its resources, but it will attempt to send troops to the Innocent, Seeker, Wanderer, and Firebrand shrines, all of which are close to the forest. Meanwhile, while no formal affiliation with the new Aions has been made, bands of guerilla fighters, most likely from Godsblood, will turn up at the Artisan and Sovereign shrines. Whether they have any affiliation with Greentruth will not be clear, but they do seem to have a beef against the Achamites. These reinforcements will struggle against powered Aions, but they might be able to delay any troops sent by Achamoth.
❖ KENOMA
Xishen will be handing out returning stones to all Kenoma the day after the dreams begin. She'll explain how to use them, and state that the Regent expects for them to head to the shrines once they become fully active. The Kenoma will have whatever mundane weapons or supplies they need at their disposal for this mission, along with some modest Achamite reinforcements. She'll warn not to rely too heavily on them however; after all, only the Aions are able to quickly move between the shrines and at the Citadel. The Achamites will have to be deployed by river or by land, and mobilizing them will take time. They will feasible be able to reach all of the shrines to some degree or another, but will more easily populate the shrines of the Martyr, Celebrant, Lover, Champion, Visionary, Sovereign, and Firebrand.
The Hylicians will apparently not be helping this time around, as the capture and holding of the first batch of Aions was already a lengthy venture. Xishen herself says she will be travelling to the shrines, however, while another Aion named Dionys remains in Achamoth to 'keep watch'. All Kenoma Aions will be given a familiar vial of black sludge, and are instructed to feed it to any Aions they capture at the shrines. It will cause the same effects it did in the cavern, though it will resolve in a few days rather than a week.
RETURNED (ALL CHARACTERS)
New characters that are found a the shrines will be brought back to one of two lodestones, depending on which sect they are taken by. This will be accomplished by their escort putting a 'returning stone' around their neck that will enable them to be teleported to a secure area in their sect's territory. It is advised for your character to be taken by whichever sect you'd like them to end up in.
❖ TO THE PLEROMA
In a dazzling flash of psychedelic light, you will find yourself brought to the Pleroma's lodestone: a monolithic rock set in the center of temple-like ruins. The entire cavern is hidden away beneath the ocean waves, just outside of Godsblood, and the ceiling itself is comprised of nothing but a barrier of water, as if held back from filling the space by some unknown force. The waters surrounding the lodestone are exactly body temperature, with swarms of tiny, violently iridescent fish darting through it. Crabs that look as if they're made of pure, clear crystal wander the sparkling, sandy shores.
There isn't much here in the way of accommodations, but it's comfortable enough that the new arrivals brought in by the Pleroma can take a moment to catch their breath. Some relatively plain but assorted new clothing will have been brought to the cavern to make sure they are actually clothed, as well as blankets and basic food items. It's a good time to ask your questions, or if you are an established Pleroma, to help out your freshly arrived peers. After all, their welcome at the shrine may have been a confusing one.
New arrivals will be permitted to leave the lodestone's temple when they are ready. Unfortunately, the only ways out of these place are through your choice of either swimming through pockets of water that eventually lead to the surface, or by spelunking through a series of tunnels to make your way the cliff faces near the city of Godsblood. More information about the city itself can be found on the setting page, though it would be preferable to keep TDM interactions to the lodestone area. As characters emerging from the shrines will start our as Untouched (more info about attunements here) they will not be permitted entry into Greentruth until they have attuned to Pleroma.
❖ TO THE KENOMA
As your returning stone activates, you will feel yourself thrust into a suffocating void, only to emerge just as quickly somewhere else. The most pressing thing on the minds of anyone taken by the Kenoma will be the vial of pitch black sludge they are forced to drink, whether it is before or after their arrival. Maybe their 'escort' from the shrine gave it to them, or perhaps another Kenoma does soon after they arrive. If not, one of the Achamite cultists wandering around definitely will. Dedicated servants to the Regent's will as they are, they are not afraid to gang up on the vulnerable new arrivals and force it down their throats.
Once in your mouth, the potion will slither down your throat as if it's a living thing. The effect takes hold quickly: as this darkness creeps through your insides, it will embolden your darkest and most despair inducing emotions, plaguing your thoughts with the worst sorrows of your life. What's worst, it simultaneously seems to awaken some form of enhanced psychic empathy within you, both projecting your thoughts for others to hear, and allowing you to receive those of the others around you in kind. Black ooze will begin to seep from orifices, or the space around your shard. The effects of this contamination bring out your worst, and its recipients will be forced to live with these effects until they accept the force corrupting them into their souls.
This world is not good enough, a voice speaks to your through the Kenoma. This suffering you feel, the cruelty that has birthed this darkness in you... it is simply the rot that is consuming this existence. A better universe awaits, one forged by your own hand, and all you need do is first bring about this broken reality's end.
How long this goes on will depend on how long the characters is able to fight it. Acceptance of the Kenoma can come as quickly as immediately, if your character is inclined towards it, or it could be drawn out to take a few days. In the meantime, they will have to stay in the barren halls surrounding the Regent's lodestone, and will not be permitted to exit into the greater Citadel as the current Kenoma are. All that will immediately be offered to them down there are stone slabs that can be used as beds and formless white robes that reach down past their knees.
Of course, that doesn't mean the characters that are already of the Kenoma can't do something about that. If they desire it, they will be able to bring food or other supplies to those suffering with their Kenoma infections, and it will be equally within their power to try anything from bullying them into accepting to lovebombing them. Once a character accepts the Kenoma and attunes to it, they will be permitted to leave, but for the sake of the TDM interactions should be kept to the lodestone area.

In a dazzling flash of psychedelic light, you will find yourself brought to the Pleroma's lodestone: a monolithic rock set in the center of temple-like ruins. The entire cavern is hidden away beneath the ocean waves, just outside of Godsblood, and the ceiling itself is comprised of nothing but a barrier of water, as if held back from filling the space by some unknown force. The waters surrounding the lodestone are exactly body temperature, with swarms of tiny, violently iridescent fish darting through it. Crabs that look as if they're made of pure, clear crystal wander the sparkling, sandy shores.
There isn't much here in the way of accommodations, but it's comfortable enough that the new arrivals brought in by the Pleroma can take a moment to catch their breath. Some relatively plain but assorted new clothing will have been brought to the cavern to make sure they are actually clothed, as well as blankets and basic food items. It's a good time to ask your questions, or if you are an established Pleroma, to help out your freshly arrived peers. After all, their welcome at the shrine may have been a confusing one.
New arrivals will be permitted to leave the lodestone's temple when they are ready. Unfortunately, the only ways out of these place are through your choice of either swimming through pockets of water that eventually lead to the surface, or by spelunking through a series of tunnels to make your way the cliff faces near the city of Godsblood. More information about the city itself can be found on the setting page, though it would be preferable to keep TDM interactions to the lodestone area. As characters emerging from the shrines will start our as Untouched (more info about attunements here) they will not be permitted entry into Greentruth until they have attuned to Pleroma.

As your returning stone activates, you will feel yourself thrust into a suffocating void, only to emerge just as quickly somewhere else. The most pressing thing on the minds of anyone taken by the Kenoma will be the vial of pitch black sludge they are forced to drink, whether it is before or after their arrival. Maybe their 'escort' from the shrine gave it to them, or perhaps another Kenoma does soon after they arrive. If not, one of the Achamite cultists wandering around definitely will. Dedicated servants to the Regent's will as they are, they are not afraid to gang up on the vulnerable new arrivals and force it down their throats.
Once in your mouth, the potion will slither down your throat as if it's a living thing. The effect takes hold quickly: as this darkness creeps through your insides, it will embolden your darkest and most despair inducing emotions, plaguing your thoughts with the worst sorrows of your life. What's worst, it simultaneously seems to awaken some form of enhanced psychic empathy within you, both projecting your thoughts for others to hear, and allowing you to receive those of the others around you in kind. Black ooze will begin to seep from orifices, or the space around your shard. The effects of this contamination bring out your worst, and its recipients will be forced to live with these effects until they accept the force corrupting them into their souls.
This world is not good enough, a voice speaks to your through the Kenoma. This suffering you feel, the cruelty that has birthed this darkness in you... it is simply the rot that is consuming this existence. A better universe awaits, one forged by your own hand, and all you need do is first bring about this broken reality's end.
How long this goes on will depend on how long the characters is able to fight it. Acceptance of the Kenoma can come as quickly as immediately, if your character is inclined towards it, or it could be drawn out to take a few days. In the meantime, they will have to stay in the barren halls surrounding the Regent's lodestone, and will not be permitted to exit into the greater Citadel as the current Kenoma are. All that will immediately be offered to them down there are stone slabs that can be used as beds and formless white robes that reach down past their knees.
Of course, that doesn't mean the characters that are already of the Kenoma can't do something about that. If they desire it, they will be able to bring food or other supplies to those suffering with their Kenoma infections, and it will be equally within their power to try anything from bullying them into accepting to lovebombing them. Once a character accepts the Kenoma and attunes to it, they will be permitted to leave, but for the sake of the TDM interactions should be kept to the lodestone area.
QUESTIONS
Is this TDM canon?
Mostly! It's part of an in-game event. However, only threads with new players that app and are accepted will be considered game canon. Threads between old characters will all be canon, but threads involving new characters that don't apply or aren't accepted will either need to be tweaked to remove their involvement or made non-canon. New characters will also be able to decide TDM threads aren't canon if they end up changing directions.
Who can toplevel on this post?
Anyone, whether they are a new character or a current one. However, we do ask for current players to do their best to tag new characters. If you are bringing in a new character and want a current character to bring them into your sect of choice, post your request here! ICly, current characters are fighting to claim new arrivals, but it's up to the player of new characters where they ultimately end up going.
When is this TDM taking place chronologically?
The last few days of April. The shrines will be active and forming Aions during that time. The dreams will start around the 24th. All current Aions will be able to sense when it's time for the new arrivals to start emerging.
What are the shrines like?
Every shrine is comprised of the crystal-filled cavern character emerge inside and then the massive statue symbolizing the relevant Legacy built on top. More information about each shrine can be found in the "Aion Shrine" section of the setting page.
Are everyone's homeworlds really gone?
That's a complicated issue, and while the fate of their world is not without hope, they may certainly get the impression its been destroyed from the dream they had. Alternatively, they may refuse to believe what they felt and attempt to dismiss it as only a vision. More about this situation will be revealed as the game goes on.
Can I only experience one end of the dream sequence prompt?
New characters may experience one ending, both endings, or neither. If they experience both they will struggle to recall which came first or which feels the most 'true' to them, as both will simultaneously be the thought they are reborn with. If your character refuses to pursue either path they can simply linger in the middle until the infinite worlds above them start being extinguished one by one, eventually expelling them into darkness in a similar style to the light prompt. Which dreams they experience will not dictate their initial sect affiliation.
Is it possible to pull another character back from the end of the light or darkness dreams?
Yes! If your character is able to resist the pull of either end, they will have the chance to try to pull another character back from the edge of the abyss or the edge of oneness. Whether or not they succeed is entirely up to the other character, though.
Do you come out of the chrysalis wet?
For most intents and purposes it's the same experience as hatching out of a real butterfly chrysalis, so yes, a bit.
How does attunement to the Pleroma or Kenoma work for new characters?
More information about sect attunements can be read on their dedicated info page, but in summary: when new characters are brought to Horos, they will be in the state of being "Untouched" meaning they are not attuned to either sect. By the end of their first month in game it is expected they will either attune to Pleroma or Kenoma, though for those taken by the Kenoma's forces, the transition will be forced within the first few days. If taken in by the Pleroma, it may take then some time to attune to Pleroma, depending on the strength of their spirit, but it could also happen almost instantly if they are allowed to. How quickly it happens will depend on how strongly they align with the Pleroma's traits. Characters who have been taken by the Pleroma but that remain Untouched will not be allowed into Greentruth until their attunement to Pleroma is complete.
Can a character taken by one side end up attuning to the sect of the opposite one?
This is theoretically possible, yes: a person taken by the Kenoma could potentially resist the Kenoma's call, and someone taken by the Pleroma could end up falling to the Kenoma while staying with them. Generally, though, we recommend that you have your character be taken by whichever sect you want to end up in, as doing a switcheroo will cause narrative complications that might bog their introduction down in plotting that will need to be done with the mods. It can happen, but it is not to be done lightly!
Mostly! It's part of an in-game event. However, only threads with new players that app and are accepted will be considered game canon. Threads between old characters will all be canon, but threads involving new characters that don't apply or aren't accepted will either need to be tweaked to remove their involvement or made non-canon. New characters will also be able to decide TDM threads aren't canon if they end up changing directions.
Who can toplevel on this post?
Anyone, whether they are a new character or a current one. However, we do ask for current players to do their best to tag new characters. If you are bringing in a new character and want a current character to bring them into your sect of choice, post your request here! ICly, current characters are fighting to claim new arrivals, but it's up to the player of new characters where they ultimately end up going.
When is this TDM taking place chronologically?
The last few days of April. The shrines will be active and forming Aions during that time. The dreams will start around the 24th. All current Aions will be able to sense when it's time for the new arrivals to start emerging.
What are the shrines like?
Every shrine is comprised of the crystal-filled cavern character emerge inside and then the massive statue symbolizing the relevant Legacy built on top. More information about each shrine can be found in the "Aion Shrine" section of the setting page.
Are everyone's homeworlds really gone?
That's a complicated issue, and while the fate of their world is not without hope, they may certainly get the impression its been destroyed from the dream they had. Alternatively, they may refuse to believe what they felt and attempt to dismiss it as only a vision. More about this situation will be revealed as the game goes on.
Can I only experience one end of the dream sequence prompt?
New characters may experience one ending, both endings, or neither. If they experience both they will struggle to recall which came first or which feels the most 'true' to them, as both will simultaneously be the thought they are reborn with. If your character refuses to pursue either path they can simply linger in the middle until the infinite worlds above them start being extinguished one by one, eventually expelling them into darkness in a similar style to the light prompt. Which dreams they experience will not dictate their initial sect affiliation.
Is it possible to pull another character back from the end of the light or darkness dreams?
Yes! If your character is able to resist the pull of either end, they will have the chance to try to pull another character back from the edge of the abyss or the edge of oneness. Whether or not they succeed is entirely up to the other character, though.
Do you come out of the chrysalis wet?
For most intents and purposes it's the same experience as hatching out of a real butterfly chrysalis, so yes, a bit.
How does attunement to the Pleroma or Kenoma work for new characters?
More information about sect attunements can be read on their dedicated info page, but in summary: when new characters are brought to Horos, they will be in the state of being "Untouched" meaning they are not attuned to either sect. By the end of their first month in game it is expected they will either attune to Pleroma or Kenoma, though for those taken by the Kenoma's forces, the transition will be forced within the first few days. If taken in by the Pleroma, it may take then some time to attune to Pleroma, depending on the strength of their spirit, but it could also happen almost instantly if they are allowed to. How quickly it happens will depend on how strongly they align with the Pleroma's traits. Characters who have been taken by the Pleroma but that remain Untouched will not be allowed into Greentruth until their attunement to Pleroma is complete.
Can a character taken by one side end up attuning to the sect of the opposite one?
This is theoretically possible, yes: a person taken by the Kenoma could potentially resist the Kenoma's call, and someone taken by the Pleroma could end up falling to the Kenoma while staying with them. Generally, though, we recommend that you have your character be taken by whichever sect you want to end up in, as doing a switcheroo will cause narrative complications that might bog their introduction down in plotting that will need to be done with the mods. It can happen, but it is not to be done lightly!
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Howl tilts almost vertically to make a sharp U-turn back in the direction of his foe, and as he does, he spots the blast sailing towards him and the reddish silhouette paradoxically leap even higher into the air. Ah, so that's the rub. While Estinien might have wings, whatever he's doing, it isn't flying — not exactly, not entirely. He seems to be using magic in his own peculiar way, to be changing altitude so impossibly fast. Yet another complication, but now that it is known, it doesn't need to be a fatal one.
Gritting his teeth into a strained smirk, Howl's elongated abdomen suddenly balloons before two long legs split away from the mass of feathers. Each is equipped with Howl's primary weapon in this form: a set of enormous, eagle-like taloned feet, with three toes pointed forward and one toe pointed back. Still angled against the horizon, his underside meets the dragon-shaped blast of energy. As much as it singes his feathers, it's nothing compared to the burn that accompanies the second dive, which Howl does not even attempt to dodge. Instead, with his body dropping into a dive again and his belly almost angled upward towards the sky, his talons are in position to snatch the dragoon as soon he gets close enough, even if he has to take another serious blow from the spear to make it happen. ]
no subject
He tries to soften his blow at the last moment, to avoid running Howl completely through with his spear, but the Stardiver is already in motion. Even if he manages to keep his lance blow from being as devastating as it could be, the flare of draconic aether that detonates upon Howl is its own kind of vicious.
And, as it turns out, Estinien's hesitation only costs him in the end. That moment of worry prevents him from clearing Howl's reach as quickly as he might have, and one of the talons closes around his waist.]
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But... he's got him. He feels the weight and warmth of a body in his left talon. Gritting his teeth, he squeezes tightly as they start to tumble towards the ground again. The knife-like tips of each claw press hard into his soft belly; the more he tries to free himself, the deeper each point will dig into his flesh. Howl has no intention of letting go, not until this is over, not unless Estinien makes him. A mix of that determination and pain-fueled panic moves him to reach up with both hands and grasp the shaft of the spear stuck in his lower chest, although his purpose in doing so is undefined in the heat of the moment.
The one thought going through his head is the same it's been since he chose to pursue Estinien: to stop him. As the flare of the attack dissipates, Howl lashes out at Estinien with his free talons, aiming not for his head or vitals but for one of his dragon wing, to tear holes in the wing membrane and crush the wrist and snap the long fingers and arm bones. Even so, there's no time to process the most immediate threat to both their lives: the ground, as it quickly begins to rush towards them. ]
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He cries out, and it almost involuntary turns into a dragon's roar, a sonic blast of destructive energy that pummels everything surrounding him. It isn't enough, though, not when Howl has such an enduring transformation. He doesn't have a choice anymore. As the possibility of his destruction closes in around him, Estinien hands himself over to muscle memory and instinct. The only way he'll survive this is if he frees himself, and the difference between talons grasping him belonging to a man or a monster no longer matters.
He will tear asunder whatever dared to hold him down, and as the ground closes in on them, he manages to wrench his spear free. Channeling the ruthless destructive power of Ala Morn into his weapon, he plunges it through Howl's leg - if the claws won't release him, he will rip the limb apart.
Whichever it ends up being barely registers to him. All he knows is that one moment he's trapped, and the next his aching wings are catching air. At the last moment, he dismounts, relying on his dragoon techniques more than the wings themselves. He holds onto altitude for as long as he can, leaving Howl to fall without him.]
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Howl watches Estinien float out of his grasp, wings spread wide to cushion his descent. In the remaining seconds before he crashes into an open, grassy field, Howl knows that he has lost, but all thoughts cut out abruptly as he slams into the ground. The impact of his massive weight throws a thick, dry cloud of dust over area around him, hiding from view the immediate aftermath of his unceremonious landing.
He isn't dead. Estinien will still be able to sense another Aion there, cloaked under the cloud of dirt, but it's weak. ]
no subject
This isn't finished, though. One grating footstep after another and Estinien comes upon his quarry, spread across the dirt. His spear is still at his side, even as one hand applies pressure to his wounds, blood staining his fingers. For a long moment, he is silent as if waiting for something. When it doesn't come, the low growl of his voice arrives instead.]
Give me the vial.
[His hand grips around his spear with uncomfortable tightness, shaking with adrenaline and intensity.]
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He can hear the clunk of boots getting closer. It's his foe. In this moment, Howl is certain that he is about to die. Not just dissipate, but die. Estinien will administer the coup de grâce and then crush his Shard. Howl knows of no reason why he wouldn't, and from what he's come to believe, Estinien will take joy in doing so.
When Estinien growls his demand, Howl does not answer. The vial? He'd forgotten about it completely. What does he want with that? Is he going to force it down Howl's throat before he finishes him? He can't think of any other explanation. All Estinien needs to do to stop Howl from using it is to kill him.
A long moment passes before Howl does anything at all. Just as it seems like he might have chosen to entirely ignore the dragoon on purpose, Howl coughs into the dirt, straining against his pain, as he brings one of his ruptured hands to his chest. When he stretches his arm back out again and opens his fist, it's not the vial in his palm, but his Shard. ]
What are you waiting for?
[ His voice projects into Estinien's head, and with it comes a wave of overwhelming sorrow and regret. He's ignoring the request for the vial after all, but only because he does not understand why Estinien would bother. If he is going to die, he would rather get it over with. ]
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It seems a clear sign of how broken the man is inside. None of this has felt like the actions of a rational actor to Estinien, no matter how Howl might think of it. From the very start, Howl was presenting him with an advantage. What was his goal, here? Was it to kill him? If so, why did he gives Estinien so much warning?]
I asked for the vial.
[Part of him does wonder if it would be better to take Howl up on his offer - to take the shard and bring it somewhere that the man could be contained, until some solution could be found to the Kenoma infecting him. Yet, he isn't confident in his belief that it works that way. After all, the difference between Kenoma and Pleroma seemed to lie in an individual's merits and priorities. Would capturing someone like Howl do anything but make things worse in that regard?
Destroying the shard was never an option, in his mind. The implication that he would is uncomfortable, even if he can see why it might appear that way.]
Give it to me, and return to Achamoth. You're not in your right mind, Howl, and if you are no longer on the field, I've no interest in harming you further.
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Howl's shoulders heave as he takes a deep breath, and although he means to exhale it into bitter laugh, his breath catches and it turns into into a sputtering of blood. As his fist tightens around the Shard again, blood gushes from between his fingers from the gash on his palm. ]
Hah. That was supposed to be my line...
[ What will the Regent think if he gives him the vial? Is the sludge... important, somehow? Howl wants to tell himself that it isn't, that the cultists seem to have no problem making bucketloads of the stuff whenever needed, but who can say? What if its possession by the Pleroma is disastrous in some other unknown way? But, more importantly, does it even matter? Howl in no position to deny Estinien's demands. There is nothing he can do now. Neither Estinien's pity nor judgment in the eyes of the Regent.
Slowly, with enormous effort, Howl pulls his outstretched arm back to his chest, curling it within his thick covering of feathers. After another moment and shuddered breath, he pulls out the vial from some unknown place and offers it to Estinien with much less ardor. ]
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He takes the vial, and for a moment his thoughts are consumed by the moment they had all faced in that cavern. Bound on that ritual circle, with this poison being forced down their throats, as Achamite cultists cooed and stroked their hair like children. The revulsion he feels is much less quiet than his wariness, flashing through the emotional space with violence. He pulls away, putting the vial in one of his pouches as if he's been burned.
His throat feels full, like something is blocking him from breathing, like the sludge is inside of him again.]
I can take you away from this.
[It comes out rough and low, like he barely knows how to speak it.]
If you need someone to make the choice for you. I could take your shard, and see if it could yet be cleansed.
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Perhaps that's why it stings so sharply when Howl feels the revulsion that accompanies the offer. He can feel how earnest it is, how honestly this olive branch is being extended, how deep Estinien's despair had been back in the cavern. It was not an unfamiliar despair. Just the opposite, and unsettling in how quickly Howl could relate. But by virtue of the offer itself, Howl knows that Estinien cannot presently understand where Howl's soul and mind is. And how could he? There's reason for him to hope. Howl has nothing. He will never be going home. He will never see Markl again, never sit by the fire with Calcifer again. He will never have the chance to apologize to Sophie... never again see her wrinkled face cooking in the hearth, or the delicate peacefulness of her youth as she sleeps under the stairs... Never, the chance to ask her if she meant what she said that night. And even if the stars took mercy on him and gave him that chance — what for? All so Calcifer's curse can kill him before his next birthday, assuming the war does not?
The spark of vague anger quickly fizzles out into the perpetual, enduring despair that has lived in Howl's chest since the sludge was forced down his throat, but Estinien's words and the memories they dredged up have brought it back in all its incredible power. Maybe it's the Kenoma clinging tight to his soul, refusing to let go, but maybe Howl is clinging back just as tightly. There is simply no reason in his mind to fight it. The unbearable hopelessness radiates out of him, meeting Estinien's emotion with equal strength. ]
Leave...
[ The muffled voice from behind the curtain of feathers covering Howl's head is quiet and haggard. The bleeding pile of feathers wobbles and contracts, as if Howl is desperately and unwisely trying to get up after all, but he's far too weak and slow to pose any plausible threat. The tension in his body collapses as suddenly as it had risen. ]
Leave me...
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He reluctantly takes one step back, and then another.]
As you wish.
[He leaps into the sky, his wounded wing straining in wind. Yet, it will be enough to get back to the Firebrand shrine and to watch Howl from afar. After all, he has to make sure he returns to Achamoth as instructed... the man getting into another fight could be deadly.]