[ Things would be so much easier if they were black and white. The shades of grey make it all that much more difficult to discern what's the correct path and what's not. And it's kinda just all grey to Amos, so all he really has to go by are his own instincts, which aren't reliable. It kinda makes being candid the only choice. That, and he doesn't see the point in not being candid to begin with.
But he's trying. He doesn't have a moral compass of his own, so that's all he can really do.
Someone else who might understand that would be amazing, especially since there are so few people Amos understands to begin with. And they're dead now, anyway.
... A mild look of concern crosses his features first, though, as he looks away from Abel for a second, around the camp. ] Do they even have glasses here? [ Because that actually might be a problem, huh? If Amos has to end up literally helping him, in that sense— well, shit, he will, but some independency might be preferred.
But then it's right back to Abel. (With a newfound realization that he actually can see him perfectly fine, with his own natural eyesight. It isn't really something he's ever thought about before.) And... maybe a little hopeful. His friend gets it. Or at least part of it.
Although he's gotta shake his head first, the movement small. ]
I don't know what right is. It's probably more the opposite of tunnel vision. Like a wide open field, and I don't got any clue what direction I'm supposed to be going in. [ He folds his hands together, lets them hang limply between his legs. ] I do what you said before. I had my people I could trust, and they'd point me in the right direction. And then I'd know what I was doing was okay. Only, you know. They're all gone now.
[ There's a hollowness to his voice; he doesn't recognize the grief. But he's shrugging it off within seconds anyway, because it's either sink back into himself or talk to Abel, and he's gotten the sense Abel would probably prefer he not go catatonic again, so he won't. ]
I mean, you learn, yeah? And you do better the next time? [ There's that hope again — because in the present moment, he needs someone to guide him. And he likes Abel. So. It does seem kinda obvious to him. ] I'm not great at that either. But people who are; they usually got a good idea of what they're doing. That's who I try to go for.
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But he's trying. He doesn't have a moral compass of his own, so that's all he can really do.
Someone else who might understand that would be amazing, especially since there are so few people Amos understands to begin with. And they're dead now, anyway.
... A mild look of concern crosses his features first, though, as he looks away from Abel for a second, around the camp. ] Do they even have glasses here? [ Because that actually might be a problem, huh? If Amos has to end up literally helping him, in that sense— well, shit, he will, but some independency might be preferred.
But then it's right back to Abel. (With a newfound realization that he actually can see him perfectly fine, with his own natural eyesight. It isn't really something he's ever thought about before.) And... maybe a little hopeful. His friend gets it. Or at least part of it.
Although he's gotta shake his head first, the movement small. ]
I don't know what right is. It's probably more the opposite of tunnel vision. Like a wide open field, and I don't got any clue what direction I'm supposed to be going in. [ He folds his hands together, lets them hang limply between his legs. ] I do what you said before. I had my people I could trust, and they'd point me in the right direction. And then I'd know what I was doing was okay. Only, you know. They're all gone now.
[ There's a hollowness to his voice; he doesn't recognize the grief. But he's shrugging it off within seconds anyway, because it's either sink back into himself or talk to Abel, and he's gotten the sense Abel would probably prefer he not go catatonic again, so he won't. ]
I mean, you learn, yeah? And you do better the next time? [ There's that hope again — because in the present moment, he needs someone to guide him. And he likes Abel. So. It does seem kinda obvious to him. ] I'm not great at that either. But people who are; they usually got a good idea of what they're doing. That's who I try to go for.